Life has no autocorrects. Mind it!
We get so upset when someone misbehaves with us. Instead of talking it out, we either keep it in, or share with someone really close. What we don’t do is discuss it with the one concerned. Probably we do not realise that talking it out would be a quicker and less torturing way to sort things out; and there is no need to harbor grudges and let them rot until they begin to bother and hamper our perspective. Of course there are exceptions where this might not be completely applicable, but communication is the best solution, always, in any situation.
I recollect many instances where I have not talked it out with people who have knowingly or unknowingly hurt me in the past. There were times when it was I who had hurt them. It seemed impossible to talk, especially because I was hurt or angry, or both. Sometimes I took it on my ego to take the first step. There were grudges that spanned from a few hours to years. But in the end, it all sorted out when we communicated. Some led to heated arguments (which did cool off at a later stage, thankfully), while some seemed extremely silly to even cite. The latter were learning in disguise.
Sometimes we make situations and people so larger than life that we do not realise nothing is permanent. What seems to be life-threatening now might be absolutely fickle the next. It’s our own perspective and thoughts that deify or demonise people, treasure or trash things, embrace or escape the situations. How we tackle it is what matters. Being stable and objective is what matters. Knowing the moment matters.
We are not perfect. We hurt people, and get hurt too. One thing we may want to learn is to acknowledge the mistake and rectify it. And, that’s not easy; it takes time to train the self to learn how to be objective. Each one is fighting their own battle. While we may rant about our own challenges, we may have no idea about theirs. So let’s tone it down. We cannot correct what we might have done, but we can be mindful in future. It will help maintain peace; more than anyone else’s, our own.
— © Sanjhi Agarwal
